Love, Actually

Love, love, love. There are so many people falling in love
these days – and then falling right back out! Why? Why the heartache? Why the
pain? Why bother to fall in love at all, if it never lasts?




It turns out that we have this whole “love” thing backwards;
you meet someone, fall in love, and then have to learn how to love them through
their faults – how to love them during the hum-drum, everyday – how to love
them when they disappoint you. THAT is where most couples seem to flounder and
fail – when they have to learn to love beyond the passionate moments. What
makes that so wrong? After all, everyone has to learn in a marriage – you don’t
know it all when you say “I do.”




The problem with what the world calls “falling in love” is
selfishness. It’s all about how I can make someone fall in love with ME; how I
can attract someone to MYSELF; how I can act so he will want ME; what I can do
to get the most out of him, WITHOUT giving anymore of myself than possible. DO
you recognize any of this? Watch a few commercials, read the back of a
self-help book, or even just look at your internet homepage! I guarantee you
will find the subtle (if not down-right blatant) message that falling in love –
that romance – is all about YOU.




Obviously, the world has got this whole “falling in love”
thing all messed up. So, how do we get it right? How can you “have and hold, ‘til
death do you part?” How can we do love God’s way? We should view the whole love
process exactly opposite from what the world has been feeding us. We need to
love, BEFORE we “fall in love.” As Christians, we are supposed to love each
other as Christ loves us. Jesus didn’t take on the sins of the world because WE
loved him –No! He died so we can have a better eternity for having known Him;
so we can grow closer to Him, through His unconditional love for us. Yes, it
will all turn out for God’s glory, BECAUSE He loved us first (John 3:16). No, it’s not Christ’s actions that we are to
mimic toward our brothers and sisters in Christ, but rather the reason (or
cause) behind it all.




Could you imagine people loving you so much that they always
what was best for YOU, they always pointed you toward the Lord, they prayed for
you, and they would do anything they felt the Lord was leading, to make you a
better person? THAT would be loving like Christ! Have you ever had someone just
drop everything and come be with you during a tough time? Did you feel loved?
Have you ever had someone give up something (sleep, food, a favourite TV show,
etc.) so they could pray for you, uninterrupted? Did you feel loved? THAT is the
type of Christ-like love the Bible talks about – Giving of yourself for the
betterment of someone else.




Now imagine a marriage built on that sort of love! Do you
think it would ever die? [I’m NOT saying you should marry every/any person you
love! I am saying that we should always be looking for ways to love/love on our
brother and sisters in Christ.] Okay, so Christ-like love is the perfect
foundation for a marriage, but how do we build from the foundation to romance?
I’ll be honest – I don’t know HOW it happens. What I do know is that “falling
in love” with a person you already love is a much simpler learning process then
doing it the other way around! As the bride in Song of Solomon says – “do not
stir up or awaken love until IT so pleases.” [emphasis mine] Let your
relationship grow naturally from your Christ-love foundation! :)




Does this “love before you fall in love” approach actually
work? Yes, it does. In the past few years I have seen relationships that
started out based on Christ-like love, blossom and grow into beautiful
romances! Unfortunately, I have also witnessed relationships that were based on
the people falling in love (a crush), shrivel into pain when the every-day hit
them and their foundation didn’t hold up. Will you try to get what YOU can, for
yourself, out of the relationship? Or, will you be able to call your spouse “my
beloved, my friend?” Romance based on love for the other person – what a
revolutionary idea! :)

The Crucifixion

An Excerpt from “When God Weeps” by Steven Estes and Joni Eareckson Tada

“The face Moses had begged to see – was forbidden to see – was slapped bloody (Exodus 33:19-20). The thorns that God had sent to curse the earth’s rebellion now twisted around his own brow....

“On your back with you!” One raises a mallet to sink in the spike. But the soldier’s heart must continue pumping as he readies the prisoner’s wrist. Someone must sustain the soldier’s life minute by minute, for no man has this power on his own. Who supplies breath to his lungs? Who gives energy to his cells? Who holds his molecules together? Only by the Son do “all thongs hold together” (Colossians 1:17). The victim wills that the soldier live on – he grants the warriors continued existence. The man swings.

As the man swings, the Son recalls how he and the Father first designed the medial nerve of the human forearm – the sensations it would be capable of. The design proves flawless – the nerves perform exquisitely. “Up you go!” They lift the cross. God is on display in his underwear and can hardly breathe.

But these pains are a mere warm-up to his other and growing dread. He begins to feel a foreign sensation. Somewhere during this day and unearthly foul odor began to waft, not around his nose, but his heart. He FEELS dirty. Human wickedness starts to crawl upon his spotless being – the living excrement from our souls. The apple of his Father’s eye turns brown with rot.

His Father! He must face his Father like this!

From heaven the Father now rouses himself like a lion disturbed, shakes his mane, and roars against the shrivelling remnant of a man hanging on a cross. Never has the Son seen the Father look at him so, never felt even the least of his hot breath. But the roar shakes the unseen world and darkens the visible sky. The Son does not recognize these eyes.

“Son of Man! Why have you behaved so? You have cheated, lusted, stolen, gossiped – murdered, envied, hated, lied. You have cursed, robbed, overspent, overeaten – fornicated, disobeyed, embezzled, and blasphemed. Oh, the duties you have shirked, the children you have abandoned! Who has ever so ignored the poor, so played the coward, so belittled my name? Have you EVER held your razor tongue? What a self-righteous, pitiful drunk – YOU, who molest young boys, peddle killer drugs, travel in cliques, and mock your parents. Who gave you the boldness to rig elections, foment revolutions, torture animals and worship demons? Does the list never end? Splitting families, raping virgins, acting smugly, playing the pimp – buying politicians, filming pornography, accepting bribes. You have burned down buildings, perfected terrorist tactics, founded false religions, traded in slaves – relishing each morsel and bragging about it all. I hate, LOATHE these things in you! Disgust for everything about you consumes me! Can you not feel my wrath?”

Of course the Son is innocent. He is blamelessness itself. The Father knows this. But the divine pair have an agreement, and the unthinkable must now take place. Jesus will be treated as if personally responsible for every sin ever committed.

The Father watches as his heart’s treasure, the mirror-image of himself, sinks down into raw, liquid sin. Jehovah’s stored rage against humankind from every century explodes in a single direction.

“Father! Father! Why have you forsaken me?!”

But heaven stops its ears. The Son stares up at the One who cannot, who will not, reach down or reply.

The Trinity had planned it. The Son endured it. The Spirit enabled him. The Father rejected the Son whom he loved. Jesus, the God-man from Nazareth, perished. The Father accepted his sacrifice for sin and was satisfied. The Rescue was accomplished.”    

Don't move too quickly from this scene. Keep gazing.

 The Rescue was accomplished for you.